The present cohort of youth in Pakistan is the largest in the country’s history with the next generation expected to outsize it. It is of the utmost importance that these young people are brought into the mainstream of development initiatives. This will enable them to lend their support to various causes and feel part of the solution. To promote positive change within the youth of this country in this time of rising intolerance, WRCP has strategically involved students in various aspects of the campaign to end violence against women. The students were involved in its Youth Leadership Program.

Working with the students gave them a sense of ownership of the initiative. As a result of such activities, our youth volunteers have been trained to plan similar activities independently in the future on VAW.

Men and boys wearing the White Ribbon declare that they will never commit, excuse, or remain silent about men’s violence against women. White Ribbon is one of the world’s largest male-led campaigns to end men’s violence against women. It started in 1991 in Canada, and is now active in over 50countries across the globe. Every year it is growing stronger as more men and boys realise that women’s and girls’ safety is their issue too.

All forms of violence against women and girls affect both the individual and society as a whole and are an obstacle to gender equality and development. Social norms and customs that sanction inequality and violence against women and girls must be changed.

A society’s prosperity increases when women and girls can contribute on the same terms as men and boys through their resources and knowledge. Tapping the abilities and initiative of women is an important driver of development. Poverty decreases and economic productivity and growth increase when women participate in the economy and the labour market, and have access to resources and functioning markets.

Although a lot of work has and is being done to empower women in the corporate sector, there is still vast room for improvement. Fortunately, all the regulators and trade associations like FPCCI, PASHA, SECP, SBP, PTA etc., are supportive of equal opportunities for women in employment, equal pay and equitable career progression.

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The highest rate of violence against women has been reported among the large labour class of the country, surviving on the economic and social periphery. Women have to bear the brunt of economic deficiency since there is no positive channelization for the frustration caused by financial tribulations. The least socially-active group of industrial workers needs to be aware of their potential to bring positive change by dispelling the image that women-related issues are elitist and have nothing to do with their lives.

White Ribbon Pakistan took the initiative of sensitizing male labourers and industrial workers through interventions including interactive dialogues. Through these initiatives, we hope to reassure them that their participation in curbing VAW can result in a more aware, peaceful, productive, and rewarding life. The intervention works in two ways – domestic violence and workplace harassment. Through these dialogues with the labourers, we address both these issues simultaneously. The underlying purpose is to magnify the domestic and working life of the worker, both of which present a distressing picture. By putting the pieces together, workers are made to realize their crucial role in dealing with the issue of ending violence against women.

The terms ‘gender-based violence’ and ‘violence against women’ are frequently used interchangeably in literature and by advocates. However, the term gender-based violence refers to violence directed against a person because of his or her gender and expectations of his or her role in society or culture.
Gender-based violence highlights the gender dimension of these types of acts; in other words, the relationship between females’ subordinate status in society and their increased vulnerability to violence. It is relevant to note, however, that men and boys may also be victims of gender-based violence, especially sexual violence. Women and girls face violence at home, in school, on the streets, at work, on public transportation and online.

They experience violence in times of peace and in times of conflict or war. The risk is intersectional, meaning that some women and girls face a heightened risk of experiencing physical or sexual violence than others. This includes those married before age 18, living in conflict and fragility, with low levels of education or who are sexual and gender minorities.

Abusive behavior is the abuser’s choice

Despite what many people believe, domestic violence and abuse are not due to the abuser’s loss of control over his or her behavior. In fact, abusive behavior and violence are a deliberate choice made by the abuser in order to control the partner.

Abusers pick and choose whom to abuse

They don’t insult, threaten, or assault everyone in their life who gives them grief. Usually, they save their abuse for the people closest to them, the ones they claim to love.

Abusers carefully choose when and where to abuse

They control themselves until no one else is around to see their abusive behavior. They may act like nothing is wrong when you’re in public, but lash out immediately when you’re alone.

Abusers are able to stop their abusive behavior when it benefits them

Most abusers are not out of control. In fact, they’re able to immediately stop their Abusive behavior when it’s to their advantage to do so (for example, when the police show up or their boss calls).

Violent abusers usually direct their blows where they won’t show

Rather than acting out in a mindless rage, many physically violent abusers carefully aim their kicks and punches where the bruises and marks won’t show.

Violence against women (VAW), also known as gender-based violence is fierce acts committed against women and girls that bring physical, sexual, or psychological harm or suffering to women. Violence against women exists at different levels. Following are the forms of violence against women.

Anti-woman cultural practices

• Denial of medical care
• Giving females in marriage or otherwise in Badl-e-Sulah,
• Practice of Wanni, where in young girls are forcibly married, as part of the punishment for a crime committed by their male relatives.
• Practice of Swara, where young girls are forcibly married to members of clans to resolve any feuds
• Marriage with Holy Qura’an

Recognizing abuse is the first step to get help

Domestic abuse often escalates from threats and verbal abuse to violence. And while physical injury may be the most obvious danger, the emotional and psychological consequences of domestic abuse are also severe. Emotionally abusive relationships can destroy your self-worth, lead to anxiety and depression and make you feel helpless and alone. No one should have to endure this kind of pain—and your first step to breaking free is recognizing that your situation is harmful. Once you acknowledge the reality of the abusive situation, you can get the help you need.

Signs that you’re in an abusive relationship

There are many signs of an abusive relationship. The most telling sign is fear of your partner. If you feel like you have to walk on eggshells around your partner—constantly watching what you say and do in order to avoid a blow-up—chances are your relationship is unhealthy and toxic. Other signs that you may be in an abusive relationship include a partner who belittles you or tries to control you, feelings of self-loathing, helplessness, and desperation. Abusers use a variety of tactics to manipulate you and exert their power.

Humiliation –

An abuser will do everything he or she can to make you feel bad about yourself or defective in some way. After all, if you believe you’re worthless and that no one else will want you, you’re less likely to leave. Insults, name-calling, shaming, and public put-downs are all weapons of abuse designed to erode your self-esteem and make you feel powerless.

Dominance –

Abusive individuals need to feel in charge of the relationship. They will make decisions for you and your family, tell you what to do, and expect you to obey without question. Your abuser may treat you like a servant, child, or even as his possession.

Isolation –

In order to increase your dependence on him or her, an abusive partner will cut you off from the outside world. He or she may keep you from seeing family or friends, or even prevent you from going to work or school. You may have to ask permission to do anything, go anywhere, or see anyone.

Threats –

Abusers commonly use threats to keep their partners from leaving or to scare them into dropping charges. Your abuser may threaten to hurt or kill you, your children, other family members, or even your pets. He or she may also threaten to commit suicide, le false charges against you, or report you to child services.

Intimidation –

Your abuser may use a variety of intimidation tactics designed to scare you into submission. Such tactics include making threatening looks or gestures, smashing things in front of you, destroying property, hurting your pets, or putting weapons on display. The clear message is that if you don’t obey, there will be violent consequences.To determine whether your relationship is abusive, answer the questions below. The more “yes” answers, the more likely it is that you’re in an abusive relationship.

Do You:

Feel afraid of your partner much of the time?
Avoid certain topics out of fear of angering your partner?
Feel that you can’t do anything right for your partner?
Believe that you deserve to be hurt or mistreated?
Wonder if you’re the one who is crazy?
Feel emotionally numb or helpless?
Your Partner’s belittling behavior or threats

Does your partner:

Humiliate or yell at you?
Putting you down and criticizing you?
Treat you so badly that you’re embarrassed for your friends or family to see?
Ignore or put down your opinions or accomplishments?
Blame you for their own abusive behavior?
See you as property or a sexual object, rather than as a person?
Your partner’s violent behavior or threats?

Does your partner:

Have a bad and unpredictable temper?
Hurt you, or threaten to hurt or kill you?
Threaten to take your children away or harm them?
Threaten to commit suicide if you leave?
Force you to have sex?
Destroy your belongings?
Your partner’s controlling behavior?

Does your partner:

Act excessively jealous and possessive?
Control where you go or what you do?
Keep you from seeing your friends or family?
Limit your access to money, the phone, or the car?
Constantly checking up on you?

• Abusers are very good at making excuses for the inexcusable. They will blame their abusive and violent behavior on a bad childhood, a bad day, and even on the victims of their abuse.
• Abusers show that they lost control because they were so angry and they will make the victim realize that it is their fault.
• He will usually blame his violent and abusive behavior on you: Somehow, his violent and abusive behavior is your fault.
• Your abusive partner may minimize the abuse or deny that it occurred.
• Abuser will use tactics to make you feel bad about yourself or consider you defective in some way.
• Abuser will erode your self-esteem and make you realize you’re worthless and that no one else will want you so you accept abuse as your fate.
• They provoke women for a reaction, and then claim it as evidence of mental instability, which implies it’s the victim who is at fault.
• Perpetrators who can justify their behaviors are at an increased risk of future perpetration.

White Ribbon Pakistan believes in the ideology of working together with the government as a partner based on the model of public-social-private partnership: state being the prime responsible entity for social development can provide enabling environment and space and we as a social development organization can implement the development agenda of government more economically, efficiently and effectively at the grassroots level. Thus since its inception, the campaign has undertaken various collaborative development interventions with a prime focus on women’s rights.

Following our model of public-private partnership, we have partnered with National Commission on Status of Women (NCSW) – a government institute with a mandate to review and analyze the laws and policies and consequently formulating recommendations for legislation through dialogue and research.