White Ribbon is running the #iPledge digital campaign asking men from all occupations to pledge their allegiance to eradicate violence against women in every possible form. It is a reassurance to oneself that, “By wearing the white ribbon, I pledge never to commit, never to excuse, and never to remain silent about violence against women.

I pledge to stop violence against women. @AskWhiteRibbon #iPledge

White Ribbon annually marks International Day of Eradicating Violence Against Women; every year on 25th of November, the day, also known as “White Ribbon Day”. We initiate different activities at national level aiming to combat violence against women from every nook and corner of the country. The activities continued till 10th of December as “16 Days of Activism” which is planned and implemented to aware the maximum number of people about true status of women according to our religion, cultural norms and traditions.

To contribute towards the prevention of violence against women takes more than simply being a non-violent man. It requires a complete understanding of the factors that contribute to violence directed toward women. As a result, it is imperative to change, and adopt updated beliefs and attitudes in order to align behavior with the ongoing effort to eliminate violence.

Fatherhood serves such a purpose. A responsible father is not only non-violent but also dedicated to ending violence against women. Fathers are in a prime position to react to issues of masculinity and gender discrimination because of their close relationships with their wives and children. Nonviolent people can do much more than be nonviolent; they can effectively prevent violence.

Generations ago, we thought every father to be a ‘traditional model’ father- their work was to work outside their homes and to be a reliable economic provider by being a ‘breadwinner’ for the entire family. It was not expected of them to contribute more than just a minimal amount of work. With the evolving concept of ‘fatherhood’, this notion was shattered. Men are responsible along with women for bringing up and nurturing children. For the past 30 years, this concept of ‘fatherhood’ has been receiving much attention with revelations that dads occupy a major role in parenting and also in ending gender-based violence.
It has been shown that fathers who are involved in the lives of their children have the ability to make them understand the importance of healthy and equality-based relationships. It can be rightly said that fathering is one of the most effective catalysts for ending gender-based violence. Fatherhood can also be a transformational experience for role models who grew up without such role models in their childhood.

Such a shift and transformation of fatherhood is a positive impact of feminism. As women have begun working outside the home, they also expect their male counterparts to do their share of domestic work and childcare. Changing that perspective is not just relevant for children, but also for women. Keeping in mind the development and upbringing of their children can be a powerful motivator for men who engage in violence, for them to stop it. It is widely regarded as a long-term solution to ending violence.
We will be able to witness less violence in society as more men focus on caregiving, nurturing, and making efforts to bring up their kids as better human beings. It will ultimately result in less violence against children, less violence against women and less violence against other men.

Many studies have clearly shown that children of involved fathers are more likely to demonstrate more cognitive competence on standardized intellectual assessments (Lamb 1987; Radin 1994) and have higher IQ’s (Gottfried et al., 1988; Honzik, 1967; Radin 1972; Shinn, 1978).
Furthermore, children of involved fathers are more likely to enjoy school (National Center for Education Statistics, 1997), have positive attitudes toward school (Flouri, Buchanan, & Bream, 2002; Flouri, 2005), participate in extracurricular activities, and graduate. They are also less likely to fail a grade, have poor attendance, be suspended or expelled, or have behaviour problems at school.

Children of involved fathers are more likely to have higher levels of economic and educational achievement, career success, occupational competency, better educational outcomes, higher educational expectations, higher educational attainment, and psychological well-being.
Children of involved fathers are more likely to demonstrate a superior tolerance for stress and frustration (Mischel, Shoda, & Peake, 1988), have superior problem solving and adaptive skills (Biller, 1993), be more playful, resourceful, skilful, and attentive when presented with a problem (Mischel et al., 1988), and are better able to manage their emotions and impulses in an appropriate manner. Father involvement contributes significantly and independently to adolescent happiness (Flouri & Buchanan, 2003a).

If we consider all such facts from a biological perspective, we would be rather surprised to find that even biology supports effective parenting. Hormonal studies have revealed that dads show increased levels of oxytocin during the first weeks of their babies’ lives. This hormone, sometimes called the “love hormone,” increases feelings of bonding among groups. Dads get an oxytocin boost by playing with their babies, according to a 2010 study published in the journal Biological Psychiatry.

Fatherhood also leads to declines in testosterone, the “macho” hormone associated with aggressive behaviour.
All in all, it can be said that,
Involved dads = Successful children

Keeping in mind the value of campaigning through print and electronic media, White Ribbon has successfully engaged journalists from all over the country. It provides them with the facilities of a resource centre to enable them to research their features, videos, articles etc. and hold training workshops to teach the method of gender-sensitive reporting.

To make the initiative of gender sensitization of the media a sustainable effort, a network of media alumni has also been set up, and so far, most of the journalists who are involved in the engagement process have become active members of the White Ribbon Media Alumni. The main objective of this network is to promote the concept of gender-sensitive reporting within media and to advocate women’s rights through articles, news reports, and features.

In order to formalize the concept of gender sensitivity in media, White Ribbon launched a Code of Ethics for Gender Sensitive Reporting during its first National Conference on Gender and Media, held on the International Women’s Day 2012, in Islamabad. Code of Ethics, endorsed by 150 journalists present at the event, includes Basic Principles of gender-sensitive reporting; Mainstreaming Gender in Media Coverage; Accountability and Impartiality, Gender Stereotyping; Coverage of Gender-Based Violence; Workplace – Capacity Building and Promotion.

To assess the implementation of the Code of Ethics, White Ribbon held the second National Conference on Gender and Media on International Women’s Day 2013. The major highlight of the second conference was White Ribbon Media Awards – for which the journalists submitted about 100 entries. Acknowledging the efforts of journalists on gender-sensitive reporting, White Ribbon gave away the awards in the categories of Print, Broadcast, Web, and Photo Journalism.

In recent years, the Government of Pakistan introduced and implemented various laws and amendments to counter gender-based discrimination, violence against women, and economic and social empowerment of women. These laws address different forms of violence against women like workplace harassment, acid attacks, honour killings, forced marriages etc.

Women’s rights are protected by the Constitution, and other legislative measures are taken by the government but still victims are unable to get relief in true spirit of all these pro-women laws because of lack of awareness and implementation of the laws. The stakeholders including police, judiciary, lawyers, MLOs and service providers lack capacity for effective implementation of women-friendly legislation.

White Ribbon has initiated a nationwide legal literacy campaign to address this situation. The initiative includes:

• A review of national and provincial pro-women laws
• Training and capacity building of key stakeholders
• Provide legal assistance to victims
• Raising awareness online and offline amongst women and communities at large
• We have also reviewed and analyzed laws which need to be amended in favor of women. We have made advocacy efforts through engagement of
  parliamentarians and media for amendments in the anti-women laws.

Laws and Remedies regarding Violence against Women

Recognizing when others are being abused. It’s impossible to know with certainty what goes on behind closed doors, but there are some telltale signs and symptoms of emotional abuse and domestic violence. If you witness these warning signs of abuse in a friend, family member, or co-worker, take them very seriously.

Warning signs of abuse in other people who are being abused may:

Seem afraid or anxious to please their partner
Go along with everything their partner says and does
Check-in often with their partner to report where they are and what they’re doing
Receive frequent, harassing phone calls from their partner
Talk about their partner’s temper, jealousy, or possessiveness

Warning signs of physical violence:
People who are being physically abused may:

Have frequent injuries, with the excuse of “accidents”
Frequently miss work, school, or social events without explanation
Dress in clothing designed to hide bruises or scars (e.g. wearing long sleeves in the summer or sunglasses indoors)

Warning signs of isolation:
People who are being isolated by their abuser may:

Be restricted from seeing family and friends
Rarely go out in public without their partner
Have limited access to money, credit cards, or the car

The psychological warning signs of abuse: People who are being abused may:

Show major personality changes (e.g. an outgoing person becomes withdrawn)
Be depressed, anxious, or suicidal

Domestic abuse falls into a common pattern or cycle of violence:

Cycle of Violence/Abuse against Women

Domestic abuse falls into a common pattern, or cycle of violence:

Abuse – Your abusive partner lashes out with aggressive, belittling, or violent behaviour. Abuse is a power play designed to show you who the  boss is.

Guilt – After abusing you, your partner feels guilt, but not over what he has done. He’s more worried about the possibility of being caught and facing consequences for his abusive behaviour.

Excuses – Your abuser rationalizes what he has done. The person may come up with a string of excuses or blame you for the abusive behaviour – anything to avoid taking responsibility.

“Normal” behaviour – The abuser does everything he can to regain control and keep the victim in the relationship. He may act as if nothing had happened, or he may turn on the charm. This peaceful honeymoon phase may give the victim hope that the abuser has really changed this time.

Fantasy and planning – Your abuser begins to fantasize about abusing you again. He spends a lot of time thinking about what you’ve done wrong and how he’ll make you pay. Then he makes a plan for turning the fantasy of abuse into reality.

Set-up – Your abuser sets you up and puts his plan in motion, creating a situation where he can justify abusing you.

Your abuser’s apologies and loving gestures between episodes of abuse can make it difficult to leave. He may make you believe that you are the only person who can help him, that things will be different this time, and that he truly loves you. However, the dangers of staying are very real.

White Ribbon Pakistan is a men’s movement for ending violence against women and girls. We are working with a different approach to counter the issue of violence by addressing the patriarchal mindset of individuals and society. We believe that men’s involvement in our initiative is a prerequisite to combating violence against women. Justice can be provided by those who do injustice because they have the power to do both. It is not sufficient to create awareness about women’s rights among women only but it is also necessary to engage men to challenge the unfair power relations that promote gender-based violence. Men even in instances where they are not a part of the problem can bring forth the solution by persuading others to question and stop violence against women in every form

Both men and women from all walks of life, who are willing to end gender based violence in Pakistan through changing the culture that lead to violence against women, can join the “White Ribbon Ambassador and champion Programme”.

People from different background, skills and knowledge are encouraged to be ambassador to strengthen communities and creating lasting positive change.

We will give you training about carrying out the role.

Provide you access to a variety of online materials and resources.

We will keep you up to date with White Ribbon news and developments.

Invite you to the White Ribbon events and activities.

We will listen to your suggestions and feedback.

We will award you with a certificate of ambassador.

• Use White Ribbon Pin, logo and resources that are provided as directed.
• Raising awareness, lead and advocate to end all kinds of violence against women.
• Speaking out against all forms of violence against women, as well as being involved in activities that promote women’s safety and wellbeing.
• Engaging and supporting men to involve in the movement through promoting (online/offline) and participating in the activities that can bring a change in society.
• Campaigning at the local and national level to promote that women’s safety is a men’s issue too.
• To promote the White Ribbon through engaging and educating your peers and challenge sexism in everyday life.
• Speak about ending violence against women at community events, TV programs, social media and where possible.
• Act as a positive role model for other men and boys by actively engaging in positive behaviour and actions towards women.
• Use White Ribbon presentation and material as well as follow guidelines for other events.
• Encourage people especially men to take the White Ribbon Pledge. To keep in touch with White Ribbon and offer feedback, suggestions and advice.

White Ribbon Ambassadors will be selected for a period of one year. Every year, we will renew your ambassadorship and provide you with another certificate.

If you no longer wish to be an Ambassador or if you need to take a break from your role you will have to inform White Ribbon by submitting a formal request

• You will talk about violence against women on social media at least once a month tagging White Ribbon in your posts.
• As an ambassador or champions of White Ribbon, you will talk about gender-based violence at any event at least once a quarter.
• You will wear White Ribbon Pin during media and public appearances.
• The Ambassadors and Champions will be required to connect with us once a month to plan and discuss the activities and give feedback.
• You will persuade the maximum people especially men to take the White Ribbon Pledge.

• You will always adhere to the White Ribbon Values and will make sure people know that you are a volunteer, not an expert.
• You will never share any confidential or sensitive information that is disclosed to you in your role as an Ambassador.
• You will not accept gifts, money or any item of value from anyone in connection with your role as an Ambassador.
• You will avoid any act in any way that could bring White Ribbon into disrepute.
• By agreeing to the code of conduct you will be making the declaration “that nothing in my past or current personal life would damage the credibility of White Ribbon Pakistan”.

If you are interested in becoming a White Ribbon Ambassador, please contact us.

Email: info@whiteribbon.org.pk

Mobile: 03354887775

Phone: 042 35883570-2

Office Address: 2/12 M-Block, Gulberg III, Lahore.

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